Saturday, April 29, 2006

Food Survey by the UN

A worldwide survey on food was conducted by the UN.

The only question asked was: "Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"

The survey was a huge failure,
In Africa they didn't know what 'food' meant,
In India they didn't know what 'honest' meant,
In Europe they didn't know what 'shortage' meant,
In China they didn't know what 'opinion' meant,
In the Middle East they didn't know what 'solution' meant,
In South America they didn't know what 'please' meant,
And in the USA they didn't know what 'the rest of the world' meant

Friday, April 14, 2006

Icing on your electronic cake

Pumpup your website or blog with a few add-ons that will help you get under its bonnet, add functionality or just provide a bit of fun. You won’t need a degree in HTML coding to install any of these little helpers: cutting and pasting is as technical as it gets.

Statistics

Statistics counters not only track the number of site hits, unique visitors and returnees your site receives, but they tell you whether your readers are from Leytonstone or Lima, how long they browse your site, what browser and operating system they use, and whether they take one lump or two.

StatCounter (www.statcounter.com) Sitemeter (www.sitemeter.com) and eXTReMe Tracker ( http://extremetracking.com) are three options. All offer basic free versions as well as paid-for upgrades.

More interaction

A tagboard is a message box that sits one side of your blog. Readers leave notes, which encourage conversation. They differ from a comments box as they are not post specific. Tagboards run throughout your whole blog. Tag-Board (www.tagboard.com) and Chatterbox (http://chatter.flooble.com) are popular and free. You can also add a poll in your blog. Go to www.freepolls.com or www.pollhost.com for the free tools you need.

Skype me

If you use Skype (www.skype.com), the free internet telephony software, add a Skype Me button. Readers, friends and colleagues can call you straight from your site to tell you what a great post you just made, so long as they also have Skype installed. See www.skype.com/community /skypemebuttons.html.

Live Message Alerts!

Let your readers know in real time when you update your blog. Live Message Alerts (www.messagecast.net) is free. Add the icon to your site and readers can opt to receive alerts by email, desktop alert, mobile phone or PDA. Readers receive a headline and can click through to read your new post.

License your work

Adding a Creative Commons licence (http://creativecommons.org) lets everybody know what they can and cannot beg, borrow or steal from your blog. RSS feeds A blog isn’t a blog without an RSS feed. Adding a Bloglines (www.bloglines.com) or a Newsgator (www.newsgator.com) feed to your site allows readers to sign up quickly by hitting the icon you install and adding your feed to their RSS reader or online Bloglines account.

Gimmicks

The Truth Laid Bear Ecosytem (www.truthlaidbear.com/ecosystem.php) will let you know where you stand, crawl or sliver in Blogdom. Let the narcissist in you take over and add the “Who links to me” code ( http://wholinkstome.com) and it tells you what it says it’ll tell you. Technorati (www.technorati.com) offers a similar, more sophisticated service. Add a clock with www.clocklink.com. Do you use the Flickr (www.flickr.com) photosharing service? Add their zeitgeist — www.flickr.com/fun/zeitgeist. It displays an attractive patchwork of pictures recently uploaded to Flickr, in your sidebar.

Stop Spam

Foil the spam robots crawling your blog for email addresses with SpamPoison: www.spampoison.com.

Source: Guardian

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Tension Reliever!!!!

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin.

However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!

One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice.

He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?"

She replied, "Darling, I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek"...

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Happy Fool's Day!!!!

** FOOL se **
* * FOOL ne **
* * FOOLon ki **
* * FOOLWARI main **
* * FOOL ke saath wish kiya hai **
* * u r the most **
* * BEAUITFOOL **
* * WONDERFOOL **
and ColorFOOL **
* *amngst all FOOL's **
HAPPY APRIL FOOL's DAY